Hey guys…

Since I spilled the beans today about my little growing baby in my belly, I thought I would share an entry in my diary when I found out the news…complete with picture proof! 

Saturday May 24th, 2008 

Today was the day (yelling this at the top of my lungs) I found out I was pregnant!  I can’t tell you what kind of emotional roller coaster ride I’ve been on for the last 6 hours.    

I’ve been tired and kind of “under the weather” for the last few weeks…  Falling asleep much earlier than usual at night and sleeping for 8-9 hours…little  hot flashes during the day and feeling flushed…a little dizzier than usual, out of breath…The week before this past one I was craving fruit salad at night for several nights which is totally weird for me. Hey I’m not complaining though – at least it wasn’t s’mores or fried chicken! 

This morning (Saturday)  I woke up at 5am and decided I was going to take a pregnancy test since things were a little “off schedule” if you get my drift…I still didn’t think anything was out of the ordinary, but you know.…just incase…

Once I got it in my head that being pregnant could be a possibility, I could not stop my brain from going crazy…like what if I’m pregnant.?  What is it going to be like being pregnant…what kind of mother will I be…how much weight will I gain!!  (eek!)  How will I tell my husband???”  Will he be happy?  Shocked?  Fall back asleep?  I made myself a coffee (we’re allowed 1-2 cups a day according to the internet…just in case I really am pregnant)…and took a vitamin (with the recommended dose of folic acid…just in case…) and then put on my sneakers (still in my pajamas with a coat on-top – I love New York) and set out to the 24 hour Duane Reade to pick up my pregnancy kit (besides – we needed soap and toilet paper anyway..might as well pick up the old pregnancy test while I’m there- right?)

A flood of ideas were still streaming through my mind as I get to the Duane Reade.  What if I’m not pregnant?  Will it make me sad?  Will I be relieved?  When do I tell my girlfriends?  What will I do without Chardonnay?   It took me 10 minutes to find the actual Pregnancy Test aisle once I got to Duane Reade (It was abou 5:35 am by this time)  Once I got there though, I was in EPT hell.  There were about 15 brands to choose from….I decided I was going to go for the easiest one to find out the result….the 25 dollar “digital” test that had an extra one included “just to make sure!”  And I threw in a gigantic bag of M and M’s as well just for kicks…M and M’s and an EPT test….hmmm…what did I need a pregnancy test for??

I got to the cash register and said “GOOD MORNING!”  a little too loudly for the clerk.  I had a feeling he’s seen this kind of thing before – with a bubble cloud over his head like the comic books thinking something like: ”Oh yeah – another one of THESE  ladies…the “I need to find out right away” 5:30 in the morning types that throw in other little drugstore items (gigantic bag of M and M’s)  to try and pretend that’s not the main reason they are at the drugstore.”

Once I forked over the cash, I cruised on home trying to do the math in my head “just incase” on when this possible baby might be born…Hmmm….Sometime in January maybe?  But shhhh!  Don’t think about something that you don’t know for sure…

I get home – tear my jacket off and try to read the directions of the pregnancy test…ok easy enough – pee on a stick.  And wait…wait…wait…(thinking about how I forgot to get toilet paper and soap at the store…what the heck is taking so long for this test to work?  Is it broken?  Did I “miss the stick” with my “aim”?

3 minutes waiting for a “you’re pregnant” message on a stick is a mighty long time!! 

Finally…. 

PREGNANT

I can’t believe it.  Is this for real?  What the?????  How did this happen?  Oh yeah – 5th grade health class…!

I decide I can’t wait to tell my husband.  I must go wake him… 

I rush in…he senses I’m looking at him overhead and opens his eyes 

He asks if I’m coming back to bed.  It’s too early to be up.  I crawl inside and tell him I have news. 

He’s wide awake in a split second. 

“I’m pregnant”….heartbeat…heartbeat… 

“oh my….wow….oh…” 

It was good though.  I could tell he was happy.  (a little shocked and maybe feeling like he was still in a dream sequence) 

And that’s how the story went. 

We got up – kept looking at one another…I kept asking him how he felt…and how crazy this is….

He made me pancakes (my favorite – and this was definitely a special pancake occasion)…we kept looking at each other trying to figure out what the other one was thinking… and said we couldn’t believe it could happen this fast…I think I’m still in shock.  Its now 1 pm, and after going for a long walk and a quick trip into Barnes and Noble to buy 3 “what to expect when you’re expecting” type books to read, I’m writing this out now.  I want to remember this day.  I want to remember what it was like to see the “pregnant” stick and the look on my husbands face…and to venture for the very first time into the “expecting mothers” aisle at Barnes and Noble.

I’m shocked, happy, scared, insecure, blessed, and wondering how the next 9 months are going to go…and how on earth I will take care of a small little person?  I guess we’re about to find out!   Oh yeah – and we took a picture of that little pregnancy pee on a stick test!  Just to show you proof: 

(Yeah, I decided to get my moneys worth and pee on all three!  YIPPPEEEE)